An Orison for Ferguson

I am deeply disappointed by the decision not to indict Officer Darren Wilson by the St. Louis grand jury last night. I am not altogether surprised, but I am not surprised in the same way that I am no longer surprised to find that another woman has been abused or raped. This systemic violence permeates our society in a way …

On Asking for Help

So, Brady and I are going to be creating a crowd-funding campaign soon to help us get to Africa, and it has brought up some challenges for both of us. For me, the challenge is specifically in asking other people (especially people we don’t know) for help (especially financial help). Both of us have worked our way through school, and …

The Community Killer

Do you ever think back to a specific time in your life and think, ‘Good lord, I was an idiot’? If you answered no…yes you do. I’ve been thinking recently about a time a couple years ago when I was, in fact, a huge idiot. It was my junior year of college, and I managed to almost singlehandedly turn a …

Loving Through Anger

I am not perfect–far from it, in fact. And although this is one of the most common-sense statements to make, it has been one of the most difficult things about myself to accept. I woke up angry today. No particular reason. The day outside is beautiful–a crisp, bright autumn day, the perfect day in my favorite season. And yet I …

On Living With Flies

Somehow–probably from continuously opening and closing doors due to making what seems to be an endless stream of t-shirts, or from some seemingly universal belief that being inside is better than being outside, or simply because there was light inside and not much outside–our apartment became home to several flies. It began slowly, with just one, buzzing about innocuously and …

Origins and Interrogations of Being “Broke”

There is a strange, stony silence that ensues when your partner looks at you and says, “Well, I’m officially broke.” The realization that both of your bank accounts add up to less than a hundred dollars leaves a bitter, malnourished taste in your mouth. It causes you to think about the direction your life has meandered, the purposes you’ve undertaken, …

On the Efficacy of Stubbornness

Have you ever heard that flirtatious, sophomoric girl giggle and say, “I guess I’m just stubborn!” as an explanation for her unswerving refusal to watch any movie that isn’t 13 Going on 30? Or how about that line-treading boyfriend who, upon hearing that his girlfriend’s mother is stubborn, jokes, “Oh, is that where you get it?” (Guilty.) Every once in a …

Re-Learning Faith (Not a How-To)

I’ve recently returned to Christianity–a turn in my life I think would surprise many of my friends, considering my extremely liberal and humanist adolescence and early adulthood. In many ways, I still believe and hold to many of the truths I discovered over the years of my spiritual questioning and exploration, and calling myself a Christian still feels a bit foreign …

When You Have a Seed

I am of the belief that everyone has a secret longing—perhaps not-so-secret among the more bombastic of us—to experience more life. To the deluded, this is a longing for luxury, a pomp-induced comfort catered by a trust fund and scantily-clad individuals befitting one’s own sexual palate. The more lucid understand that this fuller life simply exists somewhere in the uncharted …

The Exquisite Alarm of Letting Go

There is a moment, I think, in every big decision when a person becomes suddenly, inexplicably, uncomfortably self-aware in the decision-making process. It’s a moment at which it seems a mirror had been held up to you and you can see what you look like for the first time — and there is a startling lack of recognition. “Is this …